7 Creatures of Transfer Window

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7 Creatures of Transfer Window

Post  Jay.P.A on Tue Jul 12, 2011 12:22 am

1) The Eternal Optimist
Don’t worry about a thing, ‘cos every seemingly ridiculous signing will be alright. Sold your best striker and replaced him with a dud from the second tier of French football? Eh, it can be hard to score goals in that division, English football will suit him. The Eternal Optimist will spin everything so that it makes perfect sense.
Natural Habitat: A Betting Shop
Most likely to say: “The manager knows what he’s doing.”
Least likely to say: “We’ve signed WHO?”



2) The Football Manager Addict
Never heard of a player and have no idea how he’d fit in at your club? Just find the Football Manager Addict. They’ll be able to give you a rundown of his strengths, weaknesses, positional ability, shot strength, attitude, sell-on value and how good they’ll be in five years. Who needs to actually watch football anyway!?
Natural Habitat: University Halls of Residence
Most likely to say: “I know it’s not real BUT...”
Least likely to say: “I’ve renewed my season ticket.”


3) The Apathetic
Jaded by years of transfer windows these people have seen it all. Cynical about any link with a player they take everything with a tonne of salt. Always ready to hose down your excitement about the possibility of a signing, frustratingly they’re correct more often than not.
Natural Habitat: On a Higher Plane
Most likely to say: ‘There’s no point speculating until he’s pictured with the shirt on.’
Least likely to say: “The deal is almost done, I read it on Twitter.”

4) The Committed Pessimist
It’s all going wrong. It is. Perhaps they predicted doom wrongly last year but this time they really mean it. The club is going the wrong way. A slippery slope to nowhere. So you’ve just signed a world class player? Pah, what’s world class these days? He could get injured on the first day of the season and then what? A new keeper, two defenders, a midfielder or three, and a top class striker are essential to avoid the fate they are predicting – and even then it will be a close run thing.
Natural Habitat: Football Forums
Most likely to say: “I’m not a pessimist, I’m a realist.”
Least likely to say: “We’re looking good for next season.”


5) The In-The-Know
This creature literally thrives at this time of year and is lesser spotted outside of it. They won’t reveal why they know what they know but they’ll tell you that they know it. They just know y’know. They know what you don’t know but would like to know yet they never know anything that would be boring to know as that wouldn’t be worth them knowing. Now you know.
Natural Habitat: In the Pub or on Twitter
Most likely to say: “Just trust me.”
Least likely to say: “I’ve no idea.”


6) The Wind-up Merchant
Of course your best player wants to leave, you’re a small club. Last season was your peak and so next season will be your trough. Its better you accept it now. You’re a selling club. Not in the market for best players. Basically find the most controversial angle on any subject and the Wind Up Merchant will take it to a new level.
Natural Habitat: On the payroll at TalkSPORT
Most likely to say: “If you disagree, you know how to get in touch.”
Least likely to say: “I could be wrong as it’s just my opinion after all.”


7) The Sufferer of Premature Elation

A lack of football can lead to a certain level of delirium for these people. Just the slightest rumour can result in them proposing formations for next season to suit the player's strengths, making up chants, and contacting the club shop to see what number shirt the player will be wearing.
Natural Habitat: Pacing Any Room Repeatedly
Most likely to say: "Where should I get the tattoo?"
Least likely to say: "It'll never happen."

__________

SO TRUE! Beds

LOL this is quality. Clap

Name and shame them, folks! Pick nose

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Re: 7 Creatures of Transfer Window

Post  QBVILLA on Tue Jul 12, 2011 5:44 am

Ades is a mix of 1 and 7
Jay well you're definitely category 1
I'd put me,AV, and R.O.T in category 3
Villainies is number 5 (Moyes Tosspot )
Lutes is a combination of all seven due to his many faces (and chins)
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Re: 7 Creatures of Transfer Window

Post  Guest on Tue Jul 12, 2011 7:23 am

Jay is definitely 1.
Ades is 2.
QB is 3.
Internazionale Villa is 4, everyone you're linked with is shit according to him
Villanies is 5.
QB/VFL/and RoT have been guilty of 6's behaviour in the past (By which I mean being realistic about Villa's status)
And Jay gets number 7 as well.

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Re: 7 Creatures of Transfer Window

Post  Avfc_4eva_Sotc on Tue Jul 12, 2011 9:46 am

I'm certainly number 3

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Re: 7 Creatures of Transfer Window

Post  ADRIAN_1976 on Tue Jul 12, 2011 9:49 am

Jesus is def no.1 by a mile.. over the moon with Dyer Quashie Boa Morte and baldly predicting that smashes the Ash Young deal Rolling Eyes

QB is def no.5.. ala Barry Ferguson and also the word 'Pub' is used in no.5 Very Happy

Mr sit on the fence aka RoT is def no.3

Villanies could be any of the 7 depending what mood he is.. i.e drunk..loved up with mrs or dirty weekend with ex Mad

Lutes thinks he tries to be a 6 on here but is a 1 on text Wink

Jay is a mixture of 1 and 7

Jak would have his own category of No.8 called 'The average signing'.. where every player besides the likes of Bergkamp and Henry are just plain average.. so what they win titles or cups.. there still average Pick nose

Jpr is a no.1 with any Arsenal signing..

AVFC is a cross between 3 and 5
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Re: 7 Creatures of Transfer Window

Post  QBVILLA on Tue Jul 12, 2011 10:47 am

ADRIAN_1976 wrote:Jesus is def no.1 by a mile.. over the moon with Dyer Quashie Boa Morte and baldly predicting that smashes the Ash Young deal Rolling Eyes

QB is def no.5.. ala Barry Ferguson and also the word 'Pub' is used in no.5 Very Happy

Mr sit on the fence aka RoT is def no.3

Villanies could be any of the 7 depending what mood he is.. i.e drunk..loved up with mrs or dirty weekend with ex Mad

Lutes thinks he tries to be a 6 on here but is a 1 on text Wink

Jay is a mixture of 1 and 7

Jak would have his own category of No.8 called 'The average signing'.. where every player besides the likes of Bergkamp and Henry are just plain average.. so what they win titles or cups.. there still average Pick nose

Jpr is a no.1 with any Arsenal signing..

AVFC is a cross between 3 and 5

Has the Clacton Conk shaved his bonce?
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Re: 7 Creatures of Transfer Window

Post  Avfc_4eva_Sotc on Tue Jul 12, 2011 10:57 am

I never pretend to be in the know Tosspot


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Re: 7 Creatures of Transfer Window

Post  QBVILLA on Tue Jul 12, 2011 10:58 am

Avfc_4eva_Sotc wrote:I never pretend to be in the know Tosspot


i'll testify to that Wink
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Re: 7 Creatures of Transfer Window

Post  Ringo on Tue Jul 12, 2011 4:52 pm

Reading that lot I felt a strange affiliation to No.4.
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Re: 7 Creatures of Transfer Window

Post  Avfc_4eva_Sotc on Tue Jul 12, 2011 4:54 pm

Ringo wrote:Reading that lot I felt a strange affiliation to No.4.

bollocks, your 6.

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Re: 7 Creatures of Transfer Window

Post  Ringo on Tue Jul 12, 2011 4:56 pm

Only a '6' if it involves Aston Villa Razz
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Re: 7 Creatures of Transfer Window

Post  villainies on Tue Jul 12, 2011 5:34 pm

I swing wildly between 1 & 4.
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Re: 7 Creatures of Transfer Window

Post  truevillan on Wed Jul 13, 2011 7:07 pm

im a 3 Shocked
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Re: 7 Creatures of Transfer Window

Post  QBVILLA on Wed Aug 31, 2011 6:42 pm

Well lads,how are the emotions today?
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Re: 7 Creatures of Transfer Window

Post  Bedshammer on Wed Aug 31, 2011 6:47 pm

I've got heartburn.
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Re: 7 Creatures of Transfer Window

Post  villainies on Wed Aug 31, 2011 7:38 pm

4. We are totally fecked. Lower mid table shite back to the bad old days crap football low attendances struggle to get players in wank. RL needs to sell up.
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Re: 7 Creatures of Transfer Window

Post  roadoftrinity on Wed Aug 31, 2011 7:42 pm

villainies wrote: RL needs to sell up.

Who to?

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Re: 7 Creatures of Transfer Window

Post  villainies on Wed Aug 31, 2011 7:46 pm

Someone very wealthy.
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Re: 7 Creatures of Transfer Window

Post  villanfromluton on Wed Aug 31, 2011 7:50 pm

villainies wrote:Someone very wealthy.

No shit sherlock, same as about 89 others clubs then. Rolling Eyes
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Re: 7 Creatures of Transfer Window

Post  roadoftrinity on Wed Aug 31, 2011 7:53 pm

villainies wrote:Someone very wealthy.

That is the problem though, other than about 2 owners, the others want to make some kind of profit with a club. Learner has shown that it is not possible to do so with Villa as we don't have the fans to go through the turnstyles or the profile for sponsership.

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Re: 7 Creatures of Transfer Window

Post  Jay.P.A on Wed Aug 31, 2011 8:25 pm

roadoftrinity wrote:
villainies wrote:Someone very wealthy.

That is the problem though, other than about 2 owners, the others want to make some kind of profit with a club. Learner has shown that it is not possible to do so with Villa as we don't have the fans to go through the turnstyles or the profile for sponsership.

Really?

I thought while MON was in charge, our average home attendence was about 38K?
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Re: 7 Creatures of Transfer Window

Post  roadoftrinity on Wed Aug 31, 2011 9:03 pm

Jay.P.A wrote:
I thought while MON was in charge, our average home attendence was about 38K?

Still not enough to extend the ground though is it? And that was when we were flying high. In MON's final season we sold out once, maybe twice. In that season we got to a cup final and a FA Cup semi final.

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Re: 7 Creatures of Transfer Window

Post  Jay.P.A on Wed Aug 31, 2011 9:09 pm

roadoftrinity wrote:
Jay.P.A wrote:
I thought while MON was in charge, our average home attendence was about 38K?

Still not enough to extend the ground though is it? And that was when we were flying high. In MON's final season we sold out once, maybe twice. In that season we got to a cup final and a FA Cup semi final.

Just had a look at the stats,

07/08 = 40K
08/09 = 39K
09/10 = 38K
10/11 = 37K

Wow - decline of 1K every year - to be expected though, with the season ticket prices going up every year.
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Re: 7 Creatures of Transfer Window

Post  roadoftrinity on Wed Aug 31, 2011 9:16 pm

Jay.P.A wrote:

Just had a look at the stats,

07/08 = 40K
08/09 = 39K
09/10 = 38K
10/11 = 37K

Wow - decline of 1K every year - to be expected though, with the season ticket prices going up every year.

True, but my point was, and it's to do with loads of factors such as the recession, the Premier League becoming boring etc we don't have the fans to pay through the door.

When Lerner brought the club, he hoped he was awaking a sleeping giant, we would be able to fill a 50k stadium with a waiting list of fans and have massive sponsorship deals, it didn't happen so we have to cut our cloth accordingly and that is 7th to 10th in the Premier League. I'm more than happy with that and hopefully we will be able to get some luck with our batch of youngsters as well, watch them come through and get some luck in the cups.

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Re: 7 Creatures of Transfer Window

Post  Jay.P.A on Wed Aug 31, 2011 9:21 pm

roadoftrinity wrote:
Jay.P.A wrote:

Just had a look at the stats,

07/08 = 40K
08/09 = 39K
09/10 = 38K
10/11 = 37K

Wow - decline of 1K every year - to be expected though, with the season ticket prices going up every year.

True, but my point was, and it's to do with loads of factors such as the recession, the Premier League becoming boring etc we don't have the fans to pay through the door.

When Lerner brought the club, he hoped he was awaking a sleeping giant, we would be able to fill a 50k stadium with a waiting list of fans and have massive sponsorship deals, it didn't happen so we have to cut our cloth accordingly and that is 7th to 10th in the Premier League. I'm more than happy with that and hopefully we will be able to get some luck with our batch of youngsters as well, watch them come through and get some luck in the cups.

Very true. Just didn't happen. Plus I'm sure there were plans to build stands in the corners of VP, giving an extra 8K.
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Re: 7 Creatures of Transfer Window

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